Self Confidence is a skill that requires you to have a belief in oneself. I would also like to add to this definition to me it’s also believing and trusting in a higher power for me it’s God. Self Confidence is a journey that can take us in and out of our comfort zone. Self-confidence is also knowledge and understanding that you don’t know everything, we can admit to making mistakes but are willing to learn and move forward.
Self Confidence is much like a muscle that you need to keep on working at otherwise you can slowly lose it.
WHY develop Confidence?
- Self Confidence can enhance your reputation (jobs, colleagues, friends)
- Attract positive people around you
- Open up many doors of opportunity
- Confident people bring out confidence in others
HOW to develop Confidence?
- Repetition:More you do something that more confident you get at it. Like a sport, or an instrument the more you practice the more confident you are to perform.
- Positive Talk: We all have our own personal insecurities. But focus on the negative will not help us in any way. Turn those negatives into positives. Make affirmations for yourself so you can always refer to when you are tempted to say something negative.
- Body Language
- Set Goals:seeing the bigger picture helps you know where you are going and gives you purpose therefore you feel confident about yourself.
- Positive Reflection: Reflect on the things you have accomplished this will also help you as you tackle new tasks. Reminding yourself that you have already done difficult things can help give you the boost of confidence to face the new challenges ahead.
No one will believe in you unless you do! You are unique and amazing! Be your best most amazing self because there is nobody in the world that can do you like you!
What are some things you do to help boost your confidence? Please I would love to know what you think. Comment and Share if you felt that this helped you!!
Keep spreading your light!! Because the world needs you!
As you know for those who have been following my youtube channel I just did a post about values that I wish to live by this year. One of those is that of simplifying. To start off this whole simplify theme in my life I have decided that I want to start off with my wardrobe. As you can see by this picture it is a huge ugly mess of clothing everywhere. By minimizing my clothing, the hopes is I will also be better organized.
Everything thrown in a pile
After getting everything thrown in the pile, I organized the dresses, shirts, pants and skirts etc into their own individual piles. After getting them in the piles I just picked the items that made me happy and I knew for certain I was going to wear. If I wasn’t 100% sure I put it into a different pile. So I had piles for YES, Maybe and NO. I then went through the Maybe pile and kept what I wanted and discarded the rest. PRESTO!!!
At the beginning I was pretty gung ho and thought I could do a 10 item wardrobe but then realized it was still a little too soon for me to do 10 items so I have done about a 15 -17 item wardrobe. (depends on what you call outfits) I had also managed to get rid of about 7 pairs of shoes. Hopefully I get to that point where I can get it down to only 10 outfits.
Why Minimize your Wardrobe?
- More time to do productive things
- Organizing your wardrobe is now a breeze
- Have more money in the bank
- Less clutter in your wardrobe = Less mess (especially for me)
- Packing for trips is easier
- Sense of clarity and clearness in your bedroom!!!
Just going through my clothing and purging them was very therapeutic and liberating. I am now excited to open my wardrobe and not feel overwhelmed from the mess and disorder. I am also excited to apply this idea into the other areas of my life, kitchen, bathroom, linen, decor etc.
Advice for those wanting to start:
- define your style (Vintage, Hipster, Boho, Retro etc) This was the hardest part for me.
- read about other minimalists and how they do it (we all have our own ways)
- decide how much you can manage and go for it!!!
- read 12 steps to minimizing your wardrobe or lots of fun youtube videos on it
This year is going to be an amazing year!!!! You make it what you want it be right!!!? I am not fantastic with big new year’s resolutions so setting values is more my thing. I also prefer doing monthly goals as it is easier for me to stay accountable with shorter period of times.
So this year I have decided to set these values as a foundation for my Personal Development this year. These values will be a base for me to set my goals around.
- Nourish and Exercise my Mind – This can be done by reading uplifting and inspiring books. Reading personal development books. I also find that reading scriptures also enlighten my mind and enlarge my understanding.
- Act Consciously – Thinking before I do anything. Thinking before I talk. Thinking before I eat and asking myself do I really want it. Being conscious and being purposeful in all my actions.
- Simplify – “Less is more” Physically, spiritually, emotionally, mentally and socially clearing out the clutter in your life helps you focus on the real things that matter. e.g having so many outfits means a bigger amount of time to sort through clothing, laundry and space in your house
- Listen – actually talking to somebody and listening about what they are saying not just thinking about your response.
- Be Present – wherever you are taking in that present moment, not thinking about the past the future just being there and the now!
My mantra for 2016 is as follows:
Faith finds Solutions Doubt finds Problems
What are your values or goals for this year? How are you planning on accomplishing them? Let me know in the comments below! Best wishes for the upcoming new year may it be prosperous, productive and fulfilling!
As this year is coming to a close, and thanksgiving is coming up, I would be so ungrateful if I did not recognize my many blessings through the year. I thought this would be a perfect time to reflect as december will be just hectic christmas beast mode time. This is by no means to boast because there really is nothing to boast about when all things are given to us from above, and nothing really does belong to us they are all His for His purpose. He is the giver and taker of all, we appreciate them while we have them and also appreciate them when we don’t.
This year has been a very eventful year. Had my first baby at the beginning of the year! YAY! She was born with a bilateral cleft lip which was a complete shocker to us! This was an extremely difficult time for me because I couldn’t help but blame myself. (the hormones didn’t help either) but we managed to get over blaming my bad eating and pregnancy cravings, or random cultural superstitions and loved her like nothing else. After her birth we were blessed with paying $2000 for a little newborn!! (love the healthcare system NOT!) Then to add to that we had more costs for her surgery as well.( fun fun fun) But as I count my many blessings I am so grateful that our insurance was able to help out and she is the sweetest blessing we have received!
After the baby was born we bought our first house. Had a fair bit of renovation work, painted the entire interior of the house and carpeted the whole house and tiled a few areas. Again I have to count my many blessings with the many people who helped us out with this project, especially my parents spending their entire vacation sanding and painting. With renting out the basement we have had to practice a minimalist style living, and I have also been able to do lots of fun DIY decor with random things around the house. I am also so grateful that we have awesome renters that are way too nice and are so awesome and pay on time!
A big milestone for me was for the first time in my life since I started working at 15 I did not have a real job of some sort. I was officially a “Stay at Home Mother.” It was extremely difficult for me at first as I considered myself an extremely independent woman! I didn’t have to rely on nobody. Can I just say how much it is a privilege it is to be able to stay home with my little baby and watch her grow every step of the way. We have been so blessed that my husband currently has a job that is able to support us while he is studying full-time and working full-time. My whole life I had joked about being a stay home mum but didn’t actually think it was going to come true. But iI have to say that this opportunity to stay at home may not always present itself so while it is here I will enjoy it and make the most of it.
Personally I knew that I couldn’t just sit and watch movies or YouTube or reality TV shows all day. I also knew that I didn’t want to clean my house all day everyday so I managed to find an outlet to keep me feeling “busy” and somewhat productive. This is what led me to officially starting this blog. I really didn’t have an end goal with the blog as there were so many things I am passionate about. I was also way too scared to start this blog because of what people would think about me!!!!! (Isn’t that sad that we live our lives because of what people think of us.) I knew that my grammar was terrible and I didn’t even know what to write about.I also didn’t want to be “oh another blogger” But eventually I had to overcome all my self-doubt and JUST DO IT! The majority of this year you I have been just playing around with several layouts, several logos as I went through this whole process. (thanks for bearing with me) So that’s why you have probably been seeing so many random things here and there. It was just me trying to figure things out, figure who I was, figuring out my style and where I wanted to go. Eventually I rediscovered my love for topics on self-improvement and self-development. I loved studying why people do the things they do and studying people’s behaviour. I also have had several impressions to focus in on strengthening the family and family psychology. So after a whole year of just blogging random posts, I have finally come to know my area.I feel that personal growth and family are two I know I need to learn and grow from the most and I feel like this is where I will thrive the most.
This past year I have grown a lot in terms of understanding and learning about my personal purpose and vision. I have set goals out financial and time freedom. I have progressed so much more than the first year with my relationship with my husband (but there’s the occasional freak out). I am always finding ways to improve myself as a teacher, mother and an example to my daughter. I am endeavouring to enjoy quality time with my daughter being present with her just being together without phones, cameras or any technology between us trying to capture each moment. I love being a mother and love my life (cliche I know).
In a few days I am privileged to visit my family for both my brother and sisters weddings. And baby also gets to have her first christmas with the family in New Zealand. Although our bank account has not increased whatsoever in monetary value this year we have been blessed with way more than we deserve. I am so grateful for a loving Heavenly Father who continually watches, protects and blesses us even though we don’t deserve any of it.
So with this reflection of this year there were plenty of both ups and downs. There are still many things I want to work on.. What are some of your reflections of the year behind us? What have you learnt? What do you want to avoid or repeat? Would love to hear your thoughts.
To be continued: Vision & Goals for the New Year
I had an interesting conversation with this lady where she shared with me a personal story about her granddaughter; she had found out that her granddaughter had been stealing people’s belongings. Listening to this I would have automatically assumed she was just a naughty child! I would label her as a thief and want to avoid her. But as this grandmother continued her story she went on to say how this grand-daughter had been sexually abused and been moved around from home to home. This changed my outlook on her behaviour. As a result of her unstable upbringing she turned to material possessions for comfort for security because she felt she lacked that kind of love from any physical relationships in her life. I thought this is such a beautiful example that illustrates how much we need real love in our life. This young girl felt she had no other option other to turn to physical things and if she didn’t have it she ended up stealing it. From this story there are so many lessons we can learn but I want to focus on detaching ourselves from Material Possessions. Many of us haven’t been through this traumatic experience, but we all have experienced something which has made us attach ourselves to physical temporal things, although we may be surrounded by many loving family members, friends and even our dear animals.
Why are we humans so attached to stuff? Why do we let our possessions define who we are? Why do we let our possessions take over majority of our life? Why do we work the majority of our lifetime to fill our homes and lives with things that diminish in value? Why do we constantly buy things that always need an upgrade the year later?
If we actually take some time to reflect on our life, we may be able to pinpoint a time or a thought process to why we have attached ourselves to physical things. Whether we do it because we had nothing growing up, or we do it because the society we have grown up in or we do it because of security. Once we figure out our root cause we will then be able to slowly detach ourselves from those physical things.
What’s the big deal?
Materialism is a trap that is never ending. It is ongoing and can never suffice. We can go our entire lives trying to accumulate things and things that will never give us true happiness and joy. Why? This is because we are not physical we are spirits in a physical body therefore only that which is spiritual can give us complete joy. Many people only recognize this once they get to the end of the lives, they regret spending the majority of their life on the things that didn’t matter most.
We are a Spiritual being having a Human Experience
Are you focusing on buying a fancy american dream home? Are you focusing on making sure you have the latest model cars or gadgets? Are you focused on looking like you are doing “WELL” on social media? No it’s not bad to enjoy things and have nice things, but what you should always remember is that things won’t give you the joy and happiness you really want. If your goal is to buy a fancy house evaluate it so that your goal is to make beautiful memories with your family in your home.
Create a life of deep experiences, people, family, friends, nature. Develop talents, character as we serve those around us. We need to seek to have spiritual experiences so that our spirits grow and feel a sense of real fulfillment and joy.
What do you do to enrich your spirit?
Last week I was super blessed to be able to attend an all women’s conference with some of the leaders of our church. We were privileged to be trained by the wives of our temple president, mission president, seventy and an apostle. It was such an amazing experience especially to have the opportunity for the spirit to teach us whatever message we needed to hear through these lovely ladies. There were lots of things that stood out to me but one that I would like to touch on today is that of..
What sign are they wearing?
This is a such wonderful phrase that if we memorize and keep it on hand all the time, it will be able to help us be kind to all those around us, love and be kind to those who may be mean or even attack us.
Take a second to imagine if every single person had a sign hanging from their neck letting people know the trials they were going through. Would you treat that person a little kinder? Would you let them in front of you in the line? Would you greet them with a smile? Would you let them pull into a carpark you were first to?
” I am going through a divorce”
” I just got diagnosed with cancer”
” I am feeling overwhelmed and stressed”
” I am trying to figure things out as a new mother”
” I am feeling lonely”
” I just lost my job”
” I just got into an accident”
There is nobody on this earth that is living a completely blissful life. We all have our struggles, insecurities, trials and challenges. Some may handle it or hide it better than others. We JUST need to be nicer to EVERYONE because the bottom line is We Don’t KNOW! Treat people as if we can read their sign hanging from their neck. If we make a conscious effort to remember this phrase and come from a place of understanding we ourselves will be able to attain joy beyond measure. Joy that will in turn help us with our own personal challenges.
Happy Friday my lovely friends
Why is childhood, such an important stage of our lives? In childhood we start to shape our value system, to learn about social connections and learn about life in general. After that, coming phase of puberty and what happened in those two stages can affect almost permanently on our lives. Till this time, we are already building our first experiences about life (good, bad experience, fears, love), also we learned about our feelings, emotions and how to express or depress it. Whatever our experience, we are starting to build the “patterns”. Personally, I like to use the word programs. The program is some believing or conclusion usually after the some emotional situation where we are repeating the same pattern of behavior. This kind of pattern can be repeated multiple times in the future and usually without understanding the reason or the core of the problem.
One of the hardest things in self-development is to become aware of this kind of programs and the second is to learn how to change it! Before we go deeper in into this subject, I would like to tell you the way I am describing using the technique or advice is what worked for me. You will need to adjust the technique your own personal circumstances.
I started this kind of practice 10 years ago and I remember that one particular sentence, my spiritual teacher said to me: “You can lie to everyone else, but you cannot lie to yourself!” That means you can choose how the other people see you, but who you really are, only you will know.
That meant my first task was to discover who I was. Also, my goal was to discover the reason why I was behaving certain ways. Was because of my “programs” or was it my true self. I started this journey with questioning every little detail about myself and my behavior. Continuously asking questions such as: “Why do you like this or that? Are you sure that you really like that person/situation or you just think you like it”. I questioned almost everything, I wanted to know what makes me happy, sad, mad or frightened and also, I wanted to know the reason why I am feeling certain ways (is it because of my programs, influence of the society, my fears, my ambitions or expectations from the society). I have already warned you, you need to build your own system of self-discovering. On this journey you will be faced with the best and the worst, darkest part of your inner self and can be very painful and hard stage of self-development. But at the same time, it’s a very important one, because you cannot change anything until you discover who you are and who you want to became. This process can take as long as you need. In my experience, I will never be done with it, but I focused on it for about 6 months and one year.
Recognition and Journaling
Some people can see that something is wrong with them, but they don’t know from where to start or even what to do as an action step. In that case, I am suggesting to use a diary or a journal. Every morning you can write tasks on the blank page of your diary. During the day, try to be aware of your feelings, thoughts and behavior. At the end of the day, write down your impressions and progress. Use open-ended questions to brainstorm answers for problems you may come across. Be creative with the ideas. Find different possibilities wherever you can.
Here is a simple example: Your goal is to develop awareness. During the day work on your task and are aware of your feelings, thoughts and emotions. At the end of the day write your own evaluation such as: More than half day my attention wasn’t in focus. I was angry at myself and that made me even more anxious. The thoughts I had during the task was very negative. After you finish with writing the report, ask yourself questions “What can I do to develop my awareness?” “What kind of practices do I need to apply and where can I find the sources for it”. “How can I become more successful in this exercise?”. Let your creativity get out and play.
The second phase is replacing the old programs with a new one. And in this part we will talk more about how different techniques can help you with this task.
Do you have old habits that people may think you need changing? Habits that you don’t think are bad? Let us know below!
This post is a guest post by ayahuforest. Visit their blog today for more wonderful insights to how to improve your life.
Reading this wonderful amazing post flooded me with so many happy thoughts! I couldn’t agree more with what Nikoya shared about executing your passions with purpose. This post stood out because my husband has been trying to figure out what he wants to do as a career after college. He says he loves sports and that sports is his passion he can never get sick of it. Fair enough right… but it didn’t sit right for me, and now I know why after reading her post.
Nikoya explains that just following your passions without real deep meaning or purpose behind it will not achieve the level of success or potential you have. She starts off by saying how when people say “follow your passion” is a common statement that is plastered everywhere, it makes us feel good but is a weak statement. Why you may ask?
Let’s look at passions, when I was 10 I was a passionate singer, at 15 I was passionate about acting, at 20 I was passionate about fashion and makeup, when I was 25 I became passionate about learning and studying people and their behaviours. She says that passion is not a requirement to your created purpose. Your passions may be a reflection of talents and gifts. Your passion is an emotion about something which gets you excited. Having passion is awesome and knowing your passions is powerful. But what will elevate your success is a combination of understanding both your passion and your purpose. There is also a warning if you don’t continuously center yourself with your purpose your passions may take you away from fulfilling your true purpose.
Until you understand your unique and true purpose, you may continuously live life doing things you are passionate about but not feel completely fulfilled. Your purpose comes from above, and in order to know your purpose you need to go to the fountain of all knowledge and power. For me I don’t have the complete big picture but I have enough to work on in the present time, as I complete them I get guidance for more. When you know your purpose you will then find a passion that grows from your purpose naturally. This is a more permanent passion that helps you continuously fulfill your purpose no matter the trials you come across.
I love this explanation of how Christ aligned his passion of helping and loving people with his divine purpose. Directly from her article as I couldn’t have written it better. “Listen, you think if Christ simply “followed his passion” in life that He would have died a long, bloody death on a wooden cross? I don’t think so. It was His understanding of His purpose that led Him to go to the cross to die. It was His trust in the will of the Father to die willingly. If He had simply, “followed His passion” first before knowing His purpose, He probably would have chosen to live a long life working in his trade as a carpenter, earning money, healing the sick, raising the dead, and teaching Kingdom principles.”
Figure out your purpose and from there your passions will align perfectly with your purpose.
Write down your passions and talents, how can they better fulfill your purpose?
This post was sponsored by 9thmind.com. They have wonderful articles that will help you open your mind and heart to ideas that you have never thought about. They also have an awesome e-book called “How to Win Book
” you can find on amazon. Go check them out today.
We live in a world where our mentality is that of scarcity. I remember taking an economics class in high school and the first theory we learnt is that of scarcity the definition being that there are limited resources, time money in the world. The idea of everything having a limit, makes us live in fear and worry. Scarcity can become your reality if you look at everything being physical and limited. Our minds are so powerful, once we create the thought habit of abundance – abundance will appear in that which you focus on. We create our own limitations because the universe is abundant.
If you want to live a life of abundance you will need to look through abundant eyes. Once you do this you will realize there is abundance in all things even in your life right now. The law of abundance states that we live in a plentiful world and that we have everything to make our life amazing.
We are spiritual beings in physical bodies
Many also look at things as limited and a competition. If somebody else gets this business I won’t. If you have money that means there is less money for me. Your abundance, your experience of abundance in no way removes or takes away from anyone else’s abundance. If you take a deep breath of air, you hold it and then you breathe out you have actually taken from abundance and still abundance remains
Our mind can create any type of world we want and with enough desire that world will manifest. If you want a world of abundance that is what will be your reality.
– Understand and Accept the concept of abundance – Knowing that we have a plentiful universe that we constantly are creating therefore there is always enough for everybody and more will help you get out of your little poor me syndrome.
– Recognize abundance in your life currently: What do you have plenty of? Do you have a lot of love from children or pets? Do you have sufficient income for your basic needs? Do you have
– Detach from the outcome: Once you have declared it holding on and worrying about it continuously will not bring you freedom. Do all actions that are necessary to achieve that goal but be willing to let it come when the time is right.E.G if you are looking for more love you don’t need to be consistently worrying about not having love just live each day improving yourself making yourself a better companion and when it all aligns it will come.
– Give Freely: Give give give you want love give love, you want money give money away to charities, someone in need or even on the street. Want more time share some of your time with others. Giving is one way to start feeling abundance instantly.
Are you feeling like you need more abundance in our life? What areas are you working on? What are you doing to achieve full abundance?
This post was sponsored by Introvert Mogul. She is a Marketing and Branding Consultant for Introvert Entrepreneurs in business. She helps entrepreneurs design a Celebrity Style brand that helps them stand up and stand out in a loud and crowed industry. This post was inspired by one of her posts about the Law of Abundance. She has some amazing ideas and will help you get where you want to go. Go visit her website for more inspirational and training videos to get your business up and running!
Yeah we have all seen millions of those silly tests that tell you what era you belong in, what food you would be, what animal you would be depending on the questions you answer. But have you actually sat down and taken a proper personality test. If you haven’t I would encourage you to do so.
Why is knowing your personality helpful?
Knowing yourself is the first step to being able to improve ourselves. Knowing what makes us tick and what will enable us to move from point A to point B will help us have greater understanding and possibly be kinder to ourselves. Maybe I’m just saying this because I am very much a thinker and enjoy seeing motives for different actions. But I really do think it is extremely useful.
Personality is at the center of how we interact with each other on a daily basis, whether you are at work or at home. It provides a framework for understanding why our lives look like our own, and not like our neighbors. Whether we’re choosing a job, a partner, or even a home, our personalities drive our choices and shape the paths that our lives take.
Our personality traits can also influence the way we view and handle money. Each personality type is prone to some positive tendencies when it comes to spending, investing and saving. Each type shares some tendencies that raise red flags as well. A little introspection concerning these things can help build a more stable financial life.
It was crazy when I took my personality test and read the description, I felt like they were describing my life to a T. It even mentioned how I prefer long distance relationships because my imagination is not limited. This phrase summed up my thoughts and interactions with people,
It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for – and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart’s longing. It doesn’t interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool – for love – for your dreams – for the adventure of being alive. Oriah Mountain Dreamer
It was like somebody knew how I was inside and out. I really thought I was the only weirdo who always asked people about their dreams, and what they would want to do if they had no limiting beliefs, but it’s good to know there are many out there with my same personality traits. If you haven’t taken your personality traits test google MBTI, Socionics Personality Test or anything similar. Then you can download an awesome app called Incognido that you can search for other people who have similar or different personality types. Incognido is 100% free to create an account, browse and search for other personality types.